I honestly can't blame anyone, but myself for the troubles I am in.

Sitting here thinking about all the people on everybody. Hell and everybody I sacrificed for yet nobody will sacrifice anything for me in the same way I do for them. I kind of have a plan but right now I'm trying to save the crap that I own especially the cars cuz fuck me at $1,000 Monday. Okay cool. Yeah it's great but now they want like two fucking Grand almost. I'm like Jesus fucking Christ man just to save my stuff. To be honest I don't think Aaron's going to be too much of her help this time cuz he's fucking asshole. Want to have the house he'd always try to go. Hey yeah this chick live here. Looking back on that if I feel like I've been used like I'm not really a friend to him. He doesn't check in or nothing. Hold. Anyway. The point is to basically expelling all my money at this point to save my stuff. Is to save up the money for like a Honda Shadow motorcycle on and to The classes all night and have conveyance so I can get around go to Palm Coast. Do what I need. But before that rental for the weekend go to PC. Hit up the mailbox. Clear the mailbox out. Cancel the mailbox and open a new mailbox somewhere around here in St. Pete, for now. Go visit my cats and try to move forward. Now it's kind of weird to people said the same thing this week about my skill with history and how I knew things and and how I should go back to college and become an archive business for a museum. I'd love that but time I'll be fucking 60 I think. But that's time that happens and then hey look I'm supposed to be retired. I don't know. I don't know where God's taking me on this journey but the only thing I can say is everything that's wrong is my fault. I can only ask that God guide me to the promise Land. It was funny today Daniel, one of the bellies asked me what would I do if I won the lotto fine and you played a lottery Daniel asks me and I'm like no and he's like. What would you do if you won the lotto and I was like well first things first getting extremely good tax lawyer and then finally extremely good accountant and then put all the money into a trust. That way it's not in my name. It's in the trust name and then disappear. Like not anyone know who or where I'm gone just vanished. To protect myself from everybody coming at me for money. If I did win the lottery or had that much money. He asked if I'd stay in country and I said yeah. You know why I do toward us where I live. I'd probably buy acreage somewhere from that. Nobody would think about. Oh yeah, Scott's over here and probably continue working security to keep the illusion of that. I'm just a normal person if I had that kind of money. But that's that's. Don't get me wrong. It's a fun dream. Be an awesome dream but things like that are in God's hands they always are. May God protect me and my cats and the things that I cherish. And may God guide my hand. My words, my mind and my heart. This is me signing out. Till next time.

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